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Hey Boys and Girls!!

Sun Jun 7, 2009, 9:52 PM
  • Mood: Wow!
  • Listening to: Tonight, I Love You
  • Reading: Text messages from Shawn :)
  • Watching: --
  • Playing: --
  • Eating: --
  • Drinking: --
Hey everyone, I know, it's been awhile once again, I'm sorry about that. :(

School:

I had my commencement for graduating class of 2009 on May 30th, I'm proud to say that as long as I PASS Socials 11, I will officially be a graduated! If I fail, I'm screwed... Sorry :( But hey, maybe I can make a deal with my teacher for him to pass me cause you know I'm special and I've had a lot of difficult times recently.

Health:

Once again, up and down, but what's the difference? Sometimes we get sick, sometimes we're healthy. Honestly, I envy and pray for the times when I am healthy, it's much funner to be healthy and out and about than to me stuck in bed or at the toilet puking or whatever it may be all day, don't you agree? It hasn't been that bad though, no Swine Flu yet, but hey everyone here has forgotten about swine flu now! It only took about two weeks of constant panic and none stop talking and people bitching about how all you gotta do is wash your freaking hands to get it to stop! Thank goodness for those of us that bitched about how you gotta wash your hands!!! Just a few simple flu's, a few doses of bronchitis and some pneumonia and the love was spread far and wide!

Friends:

Have come and gone. It's quite sad really, but in the end I really don't care, it just goes to show who the real friends were since a lot of them have become friends with some of the worst people in our school to be friends with. But, honestly, I don't care. It's their lives. If they fuck up, why the hell should I care? It's not like they listened to me in the first place, right? Right.

Boyfriend:

Still sticking around, I can't believe he has survived EIGHT months with me and wishes to survive more. Haha, I love you very much Shawn. Thanks for always sticking with me through the good and the bad, the up and the down, and allowing me to know that you'll ALWAYS be there for me no matter what even if it's not in person, in spirit. I really hope everything we've planned happens soon, I'd be so much happier, honestly... We've made it this far baby! We can do it :)

So, this wasn't much more than an update, but I hope you all know and realize that I'm still alive.

Love,
Liofin

Hello, Goodbye.

Sun Feb 1, 2009, 3:13 AM
  • Mood: Sadness
  • Listening to: Cross My Heart
  • Reading: Journal [real life]
  • Watching: --
  • Playing: --
  • Eating: --
  • Drinking: --
Hey guys, so sorry for kinda just ditching again after the last journal entry in November of '08... I haven't really been using my deviantArt account as much I used to, which is probably slightly obvious. I'm also without a camera, so I'm stuck with my crappy cell phone camera, ahaha. If you expect me to post pictures of that piece of shit, think again.

So. I'm 18. Cool, who woulda known I would make it this far? It's pretty shocking, really.

I've suffered one death, every month, for 4 months now... One of natural causes, two car accidents and one suicide [ouch... I miss you... all of you]

I've made friends. Lost friends. Debated who my true friends are. I always end up realizing the only person I can really truly trust and call my friend is my boyfriend, Shawn. [For those of you that didn't know I HAD a boyfriend, I do.] It's been a long hard road, with some wins and some losses.

Old, close friend Michelle [ravynsfaery] came for a visit at Christmas. I must admit, for me it was nice to see her and talk to her again for the first [real] time since before I moved at the end of grade 10, although I don't know if she felt the same...

I've become stricken with dementia and paranoia. The depression getting worse, it no longer really sets with the sun and rises again with the sun, it now is just always there... It's getting more apparent and visible to some people, but most people are pretty oblivious, but now I've said it in this so people will probably start to catch on soon...

School is interesting. A new semester starts tomorrow, which means all new classes, new teachers, possibly a few new friends here and there, or at least people that I can talk to to help pass the time, since I won't have another class with Shawn [boyfriend] till Term 4 [Heathly Lifestyles ftw].

Let's talk about Shawn. The boyfriend. Friend. The one I trust and know cares about me. He's always there for me when I need him [even though it's usually over text cause it just so happens the bad stuff happens during exam week or at times when his parents decide to be anal and not allow him to come visit me] but either way, he's always there. He makes me laugh when I feel like I could never smile again. He makes me smile when I feel I could just die. He makes me sing when I don't even want to talk. He lights my life when times get dark and he picks me up when I fall, or when things get rough. He's a man. He's in touch with himself, both masculine and feminine sides. He knows how to be sensitive [sometimes a bit to sensitive... but he was drunk, so it's ok]. And no matter what he always show's me, and proves to be, that I am his one and his only. I am the only one that he wants to be with, the only one that he wants to see. If there was no Ashley, there would be no Shawn. If he had to choose between me or everyone else he knows, it would be me [but I'm not mean enough to make him choose, since I do get along with a few of the other people he knows...] And as much as some people say it's not true, I love him and he loves me.

Life? Is tough. I'm paying rent, and unfortunately don't have my money to give to my landlady cause no one was able to take me to the bank, greeeat... So, now I've gotta wait till someone can get me to the bank to get my landlady the rent, I hope she's okay with that...

Well, I've probably bored you all the death by now... So, see yah.

With love,
Liofin.

New, Old

Mon Nov 17, 2008, 12:19 AM
  • Mood: Wow!
  • Listening to: Sublime - Date Rape
  • Reading: Calander
  • Drinking: Egg nog...
Hey all... Yeah yea, I ditched you all... again... But it's ok! :P Haha.

So, I've put up a few new but old pieces, seeing as they're from early 2008 and now the year is nearly over! Haha. I was just going through my old poetry and all that jazz and found them though, so I was inspired to share them with all of you, my dearly beloved watchers.

I'll try to put some more up at a later date, but as for now, I'm getting quite tired and have school in the morning. (Oh joy.)

... I might as well give a life update ...

Um, I'm doing well in school, all A's and B's so far. Woot! :P (Shocking, actually, usually my grades aren't that great...)

Uhm, 30 days till my birthday you guys! Let's celebrate together! :P December 17th - I'm stoked, I'll be EIGHTEEN! :P That's right, for those of you that forget, EIGHTEEN! (Also shocking...)

Bah, I can't think of much else! So peace out kiddos!
With love,
Ashley

Wow

Thu Aug 21, 2008, 7:29 PM
  • Mood: Stuck
  • Listening to: Secondhand Serenade - Maybe
  • Reading: Calander
  • Playing: Unooooo
  • Eating: Toast
  • Drinking: le Coke
It's been awhile since I've last done a journal, so I thought I'd come and do another one for you! I hope none of you think I'm dead (that'd be bad :P) So here I am! And I actually posted something too!! I have some other stuff to post from the last semester of last school year.

I grad this year! Yay, congrats me! It's going to be a stressful year, but I believe that I can do it as long as I work hard enough to do everything without stressing myself out to much, if you know what I mean ;) I have a full two semesters as well as I'll be working 40 hours trying to afford my rent (ah! who woulda thought? ;P)

As of this moment, I'm at home sick and knowing that I have to work tomorrow (not caring either). My summer so far has been exciting! (I wish to hear about all of yours by the way...) It started off with me breaking my ankle (on the first day too!) and it all went from there, had some fun times with my friends, gotten in some random fights, quit my job, got my cast off (yay!), started working at my new job (also yay!), and before school starts (Sept 2nd! AH!) I'll be working more and hanging out with one of my closest gal pals :P Hah.

I have some belated birthdays to mention, such as ~Oxymoron-Domino, sorry for the belated birthday here bro :( Yah know I love you still though! And south--of--heaven.

I send my love and regards to all the rest of you, with sincerest apologize for my lack of being around on dA.

10...

Sun May 11, 2008, 10:15 PM
  • Mood: Joy
  • Listening to: Various
  • Watching: my blinking phone
  • Drinking: le pepsi
10 years, 10 months, 10 weeks, 10 days, 10 hours, 10 minutes, 10 seconds... 10 things I hate about you, 10 things I love about you, 10 things I want you to know, 10 things you will never know. Have you ever realized how much stuff has to do with the number 10? (that was kind of random...) I'm kind of tired, so expect some stuff that makes absolutely no sense!

Victoria? Lived here for 10 months! Woot. Work? I've been at Tim Hortons for 10 months! Woot! Boyfriend? Been with Kevin for *nearly* 8 months! Woot! (finally, something thats not a 10...)

1 Month and 6 Days till I am 17.5... Oh the joys of growing up. Hah. One day I'll have a good job that'll give me money that is better then $8.50 an hour (hurray for the fact I should be getting my pay raise sometime soon... and the fact that I'll get another one quickly after)

Random 10 quiz thingy, stolen from the one and the only Oxymoron-Domino.

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10 people who shall remain nameless, and what I cannot say to them in person.

1. You, the one that hurt me in so many ways that you will never even realize. Do you even realize what you do to girls or do you just do it subconciously? Do you *know* the difference between love and lust? No, I don't think so. If only I could ever tell you how much you are disliked....

2. I can't believe you, or anything that you say. Do you even know how much of a bitch you are? Sometimes I'm surprised you even *have* friends anymore with how you treat them and talk about them behind their backs. If only some of them knew the shit you say...

3. You... Okay, I must say. I love you more than anything and you'll never realize it. I miss you and I know you'll never even realize that either... What can't I say to you? Everything... What do I say to you? Lies, I can't tell you the truth because it hurts me too much...

4. It seems every year I get older and nothing changes. You're still not there and I still don't celebrete some of the days that I could celebrate, but that I won't celebrate right now and that I don't think I ever *will* celebrate until years from now... Maybe someday you'll know how I feel about you...

5. You are an ass... A bastard... You deserve no one and you deserve nothing. Who the hell do you think you are? Putting people through living hell isn't going to get you ANYWHERE. Just keep that in mind.

6. You lie constantly... To customers, employers and to co-workers and you will never know how sick of you we are until you are gone and we are all happy... You are a fake. Get over yourself hun, no one cares anymore.

7. I can't remember the last time I talked to you... or the last time I saw you either, for that matter... Doesn't mean I don't care about you though... You're family to me. You always will be.

8. Oh my oh my... Stealing from us at work? What do you think you were doing? Were you even thinking when you did it? Obviously not because you got told the first time you stole from us that if you EVER did it again that you would be fired, and now look what you've done. But no worries, everyone is happy that you are gone.

9. Live? Die? I'm getting so sick of you and how you *always* try to make me feel bad for what *you* do. I didn't make you do it and I am *so* tired of trying to get you to stop doing it because you never listen...

10. Okay, listen to me hun... I love you. Whether you want to believe it or not, I don't give a fuck. Think what you want. I'm trying so hard but I don't even think you realize half the time how hard I try and how stressful it is sometimes for me... Maybe someday you will realize though.

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Okay... so yeah, totally random. None of the people are the same even though it seems that some of them are continuations... But none of them are, I just have similar feelings towards some people... No worries!

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